Terminator or procastinator

Honestly... i dunno what to write here.... i am sick of preaching... sick of self defamatory.... sick of saying sorry..... i think i should just wake up and do my best in whatever i can.... but then.... i am still thinking of it....

Sometimes i think i am a serious procastinator.... i tend to put things off to the last minute.... i don't know why... like studying... if i am not in the mood to study.... no matter how i force myself to do so... the words still look arabic to me..... or if there's space from now till the deadline.... i won't set myself doing it.....

I just don't know why.... and sometimes i feel dear's determination is something i ought to learn.... once she sets her mind on something... she will just do it... and will give her best to achieve it.... i don't know how to describe it... but sometimes i just look at her in awe...

Help... anyone??