Fatherhood....Finally...
It's been 8 months...
I can't really find an adjective for it... but its called parenting. I haven't changed (although many says I did...) a bit for her... But I'm willing to it needs to be. Honestly, doing things for her sake is like almost dutifully. It doesn't feel like a task. Its rather like a responsibility.
I mean she's helpless of anything except feeding and opposite of that, cries and smiles according to her emotions. What else? Basically u make every single decision and every needs of her is taken care of.
Of course, there are like waking up 4 am to change her diapers, or waking up 5.30am because she wakes up that time... then sleeps at 6.15am again which leaves u wondering whether to go back to sleep or prepare for work....
To say I enjoy it? No... not really... I hate it?? Not a single bit.
I think I would say I'm willing to take up this responsibility. To those who thinks its easy. Let me tell u there are lots of sacrifice to be made.
To those who feel that they are not up to it, they should try it out. No room for regrets, but there are no perfect parents. (Now I know why....)
Of course, I must say thank you to my wife. Honestly, she made this transition slightly easier. She allows me to do whatever I feel like doing and she's definitely taking up responsibility as well.
Although there are many times she feels fustrated about me, she will try to put up with it. I understand that she feel not as loved by me as before (crazy.. I love her more than before...). But honestly, that's because I feel that as a mother u should be more independent already.
I can't say how grateful am I to her. There are times I wish that I could say I love u or sweet mushy things to her like in the past, but sometimes it just get stuck in my throat. When I gathered enough courage... I will be splashed with instant freezing agent like "Crazy" or "What the hell did u do wrong again today..."
One things I miss is how I always plant a kiss on her face or how i would hug her from behind. Anyway.. We are spending most of our time at my MIL place so... how do i do that in front of everyone??
But I honestly love her as much. And I would definitely treasure her as much as Candice. She always feels that Candice is placed higher in my heart. Of course!!!
But I don't think we can survive without her. Period.
I love u Sharon.
I really do.
(I love u 10 times more Candice~~~~)
I can't really find an adjective for it... but its called parenting. I haven't changed (although many says I did...) a bit for her... But I'm willing to it needs to be. Honestly, doing things for her sake is like almost dutifully. It doesn't feel like a task. Its rather like a responsibility.
I mean she's helpless of anything except feeding and opposite of that, cries and smiles according to her emotions. What else? Basically u make every single decision and every needs of her is taken care of.
Of course, there are like waking up 4 am to change her diapers, or waking up 5.30am because she wakes up that time... then sleeps at 6.15am again which leaves u wondering whether to go back to sleep or prepare for work....
To say I enjoy it? No... not really... I hate it?? Not a single bit.
I think I would say I'm willing to take up this responsibility. To those who thinks its easy. Let me tell u there are lots of sacrifice to be made.
To those who feel that they are not up to it, they should try it out. No room for regrets, but there are no perfect parents. (Now I know why....)
Of course, I must say thank you to my wife. Honestly, she made this transition slightly easier. She allows me to do whatever I feel like doing and she's definitely taking up responsibility as well.
Although there are many times she feels fustrated about me, she will try to put up with it. I understand that she feel not as loved by me as before (crazy.. I love her more than before...). But honestly, that's because I feel that as a mother u should be more independent already.
I can't say how grateful am I to her. There are times I wish that I could say I love u or sweet mushy things to her like in the past, but sometimes it just get stuck in my throat. When I gathered enough courage... I will be splashed with instant freezing agent like "Crazy" or "What the hell did u do wrong again today..."
One things I miss is how I always plant a kiss on her face or how i would hug her from behind. Anyway.. We are spending most of our time at my MIL place so... how do i do that in front of everyone??
But I honestly love her as much. And I would definitely treasure her as much as Candice. She always feels that Candice is placed higher in my heart. Of course!!!
But I don't think we can survive without her. Period.
I love u Sharon.
I really do.
(I love u 10 times more Candice~~~~)
posted by sharon_alvin at 10:10 AM
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