Why Her?
Ever since Candice is born, marriage and love between us was a roller-coaster ride. We could be lovey-dovy one day and then frown at each other the very next day. What has gone wrong?
I can only admit that I play a part in this. It takes 2 to clap. I've read an article saying that how to detect and look for tell-tale sign that will eventually lead to a divorce. Firstly, its eye-rolling syndrome. Any mistake or unhappiness, you tend to bottle it up or eye roll at it. Nothing is ever talked abt and nothing is ever solved. In trying to maintain peace, I have been doing this too many time. There is no real peace. Hard feelings are only bottled up and easily triggered again next incident.
I can only say that recently I've felt very left out. I felt that in her new job, she has begun to turn selfish and self-centered. Perhaps I'm becoming selfish myself that I think this way. Anyway, I can only attribute that to her new environment. I believe stress can make ppl especially ill-tempered, let alone she is all along quick-tempered. No hard feelings towards her though, but as times goes by, I felt that my silence is taken for granted. I felt that i'm not being respected, not as a man, but simply not as a family member. She tends to make all decision, without really asking what were my opinions. I felt very unregarded.
As time goes by, I just kept quiet. Like what the article pointed out, nothing is ever being solved. I don't know how to bring this up to her. I only know that if this is ever brought up, things will just turn ugly. I don't see how she's in the mood to discuss this. Maybe I am being unreasonable as well. I've looked at myself, and I realised that the eye rolling syndrome is taking a toll at me. I'm simply bottling it up, only to just fall into silence when I feel that she start to be unreasonable. Sometimes, quite abruptly, that she herself is being confused. I like her to ask me or pester me to cheer up. The frequency of it happening is very rare.
I feel that I love her very much. But since Candice is part of us, I prefer to turn my attention to Candice whenever the silence start. I just ignore her. I know all these are never going to change anything. I am at my wits end too. I just hope it won't get too serious, that it will hurt our relationship. As of now, I know that she loves me deeply, and I definitely love her more. Whatever the case, I value this relationship as much as my life. I've seen a good friend of mine going through hardship in maintaining his marriage life. I know that I'm not trying hard enough.
I promise I will try, to rekindle any love lost, and to win her heart with my might. I love you, Sharon Lee. But maybe you can consider my feelings more?
Many, as well as myself, has asked me what did I look in Sharon that I have her as my wife. To date, I don't know. Many description like "I knew she's the one once I met her" or "She's the one that made me complete" are very true. However if you really want to attribute it to a reason or substance, I can't give an answer. To date, I really don't know. I once read that true love are like this. You won't stop loving her whatever she becomes, because there is not a reason that you started loving her in the first place. Furthermore, to date, I never come across anyone who made me felt like what she did. In summary, I don't know why I love her, but i do.
I can only admit that I play a part in this. It takes 2 to clap. I've read an article saying that how to detect and look for tell-tale sign that will eventually lead to a divorce. Firstly, its eye-rolling syndrome. Any mistake or unhappiness, you tend to bottle it up or eye roll at it. Nothing is ever talked abt and nothing is ever solved. In trying to maintain peace, I have been doing this too many time. There is no real peace. Hard feelings are only bottled up and easily triggered again next incident.
I can only say that recently I've felt very left out. I felt that in her new job, she has begun to turn selfish and self-centered. Perhaps I'm becoming selfish myself that I think this way. Anyway, I can only attribute that to her new environment. I believe stress can make ppl especially ill-tempered, let alone she is all along quick-tempered. No hard feelings towards her though, but as times goes by, I felt that my silence is taken for granted. I felt that i'm not being respected, not as a man, but simply not as a family member. She tends to make all decision, without really asking what were my opinions. I felt very unregarded.
As time goes by, I just kept quiet. Like what the article pointed out, nothing is ever being solved. I don't know how to bring this up to her. I only know that if this is ever brought up, things will just turn ugly. I don't see how she's in the mood to discuss this. Maybe I am being unreasonable as well. I've looked at myself, and I realised that the eye rolling syndrome is taking a toll at me. I'm simply bottling it up, only to just fall into silence when I feel that she start to be unreasonable. Sometimes, quite abruptly, that she herself is being confused. I like her to ask me or pester me to cheer up. The frequency of it happening is very rare.
I feel that I love her very much. But since Candice is part of us, I prefer to turn my attention to Candice whenever the silence start. I just ignore her. I know all these are never going to change anything. I am at my wits end too. I just hope it won't get too serious, that it will hurt our relationship. As of now, I know that she loves me deeply, and I definitely love her more. Whatever the case, I value this relationship as much as my life. I've seen a good friend of mine going through hardship in maintaining his marriage life. I know that I'm not trying hard enough.
I promise I will try, to rekindle any love lost, and to win her heart with my might. I love you, Sharon Lee. But maybe you can consider my feelings more?
Many, as well as myself, has asked me what did I look in Sharon that I have her as my wife. To date, I don't know. Many description like "I knew she's the one once I met her" or "She's the one that made me complete" are very true. However if you really want to attribute it to a reason or substance, I can't give an answer. To date, I really don't know. I once read that true love are like this. You won't stop loving her whatever she becomes, because there is not a reason that you started loving her in the first place. Furthermore, to date, I never come across anyone who made me felt like what she did. In summary, I don't know why I love her, but i do.
posted by sharon_alvin at 12:26 PM
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